Thirty is the new Fifty.

Thanks for the invitation American Association of Retired Persons. Even though you put out a decent magazine and I'm sure you offer great discounts at establishments I probably don't frequent, I'm going to have to pass for now. Call me again in twenty years.

There's a first time for everything.

After nearly seven years of providing gourmet-ish meals for the man of my dreams, he dropped a bomb on me. He wanted me to make a casserole. If you know me very well, you might have figured out that I am not a crock-pot, casserole, one-dish meal type of gal (chili doesn't count). Let me clarify however that - I will gladly eat and find delicious any meal cooked via those various techniques, but it pains me to even think about making them myself. After all, it's hard to plate those items in an attractive fashion and I am a bit of a snob when it comes to the way my food looks (And thus by saying this my meals will now be subject to scrutiny I'm sure. I hope not.)

I have made one other casserole, it was this Christmas for breakfast and it had feta and spinach in it. It was beautiful. The one Ben wanted me to make included - rice, ground beef, onions, cheese and yikes, I can't even write it, cream-of-junk (Rachelle I hope you don't mind me using your term). It was not beautiful but it didn't taste half bad, although "not as good as" his moms. Fine. I didn't want to be known for my awesome rice casserole anyway. And I made the unforgivable mistake of not having tortilla chips to eat it with. I didn't realize it doubled as a dip.

So another (equally disturbing) culinary first that I had this week was buying something I promised myself I would never buy - American Cheese - aka - Processed Cheese Food Product. What is that?! I've always been wary of Velveeta - how can you trust a cheese that can keep for years on your pantry shelf?

Anyhow, I read an article interviewing Padma Lakshmi, the gorgeous hostess on Top Chef, where she claimed that American Cheese made the best grilled cheese sandwiches. I figured that she was just trying to sound common and that only the finest artisinal cheeses pass her lips, however, against my better judgement and instinct I stood in front of the Cheese Food section for 10 minutes trying to decide which package to buy (I had the incorrect notion that there was only one kind - Kraft Singles). After nearly becoming sick while comparing labels, I choose the cheapest one. They all seemed disgustingly similar to me, why waste another two bucks on an experiment. Apparently, this was the wrong choice as I wasted some darn good bread making three sandwiches in which the cheese failed to, well, melt, Ben informed me that Kraft Singles were the only quality cheese food product, besides Velveeta of course. I don't think I'll be trying them - in my kitchen anyhow. But if you want to make me a sandwich or a burger with the stuff - I will not bat an eye. I might even enjoy it.

Public Enemy #1 - Mold

After this weekend mold has just taken the number one spot over mosquitoes, sand & cockroaches as most annoying obstacle to enjoying perfection in the tropics. It grows quickly and is a beast to remove. Here are a few of the places I have found it lately besides the usual grout* and shower curtain liner - on a wooden spoon that had been in the dishwasher for two days, the back of someones toothbrush, all over the double stroller, on our microfiber sofa and on this shirt that had been in the laundry basket for no more than three days. It always manifests itself as these tiny black spores. The only thing I've found to eliminate it is something I'm not a huge fan of using much of, but in moments of neccessity - bleach - not everything can be bleached but luckily all of the above can and has been (except for the sofa, which was whitish and maybe could have withstood a bleach solution, but they gave us a new one for other reasons so we are now mold free)

*Another highly caustic but effective product is Tilex Mold and Mildew Root Spray. I highly recommend it wherever you live.

Creeping Incrementalism

Am I the last person to find out that the price of stamps were raised again? I might as well add my 41 cent stamps to my drawer-full of 29, 33, 34 & 39 cent stamps since I already know I won't be making it to the post-office to get the 1 cent filler. I knew I should have purchased the "forever" stamp last time but I just wanted something cuter. And by something cuter, I mean famous American authors I've never heard of.

My other gripe is more serious. They are messing with our ice cream. And by they, I don't know who I mean, but I can tell you what brand - Dreyers (or Edy's if you are East of the Mississippi). I was at the store and was quickly going to grab some Rocky Road when I noticed that they had updated the packaging, and wanting to get the freshest possible batch, I pushed aside the last few containers with the old packaging and reached for the SMALLER, newer packaging. Of course I didn't realize it till I got home and the container felt strangely more compact nestled in my lap, almost personal size. We had another flavor in the older package so I checked and sure enough the ice cream has shrunk from 1.75 Quarts to 1.5! But my question is when did 1.75 equal a half gallon? I guess I missed the first ice cream shrinkage.

The good news is that, unlike the possibility of buying a 41 cent forever stamp, there may still be the older - larger ice cream cartons out there to be had if you act now. The bad news is, for you Breyers fans - they too have already delivered the crunch.

photo courtesy of the consumerist.

Vintage is just a fancy word for old.

Since B. did such a stand-out job this year providing various non-necessities for me on my b-day I felt I was under a little pressure to come up with a few things for him that he would like (I know it seems like this would be the norm for what you do for people on their birthdays but since our special days are close together we generally forgo individual gifts to each other and get a family gift or go on a trip instead. We also usually go ahead and toss in mother's day, father's day and our anniversary into the pile as well. Easy.)

Dr. Laura hasn't written The Proper Care and Feeding of Wives yet so I couldn't get him that. On a side note, I did enjoy the book he got me - at least what I skimmed through before I returned it.

One thing I know he has been wanting is an "Eddie Would Go" t-shirt. They make variations of this shirt but the one he wanted was the Quicksilver version with the simple statement on the front. They don't have a current version in the Quicksilver store so I went to the web to find one. A couple merchants on eBay were selling one like what he wanted and basically I picked the cheapest one and the one that was shipped from Hawaii so it'd get here on time. It got here plenty fast, the only problem was that it wasn't new! The guy (eVintage) had more than one of the same color shirt in differing sizes and they weren't being auctioned so I didn't even imagine that it wasn't new. You certainly couldn't tell from the picture. Normally, I wouldn't think of giving someone a "used" gift - but it is Ben. He could care less where his clothes came from. And he didn't even notice. Of course I told him and gave him an IOU for a new one. The book I ordered him didn't get here on time so otherwise he would have had nothing. To top it all off I don't even make the cake that he allegedly loves for his birthday (my excuse - I don't have the recipe - His response - but I do have his mom's number). Had I read more of the Dr. Laura book perhaps I might have made it. Maybe when he turns 30.

-

Sunday Free Verse

Stale Cheerios

Color Wonder

Late Again

Stake Conference

If you want to read some better poetry I suggest you go here .

Kiddie Couture

Hey Salary.com - get ready to add fashion designer to the list of jobs that need to be included in my salary. Avery asked me if I could help her make a dress for her poor naked doll (it is Erica the pauper from Barbie's Princess and the Pauper after all) and dress her we did. Finally a good use for all of those pieces of felt I've been saving to make a quiet book with! We also made a cape and some jewelery for her as well - finally a good use for the hundred lbs of beads I have under my bed - Tami what are you doing with yours?

A. hated the bow on the cape by the way - who does she think she is - Nina Garcia? I'm surprised I wasn't auffed (as in auf Wiedersehen) right then and there.

I'd recognize that foot anywhere.

That's M.s' little foot dipping in the pool (navy/green). One Step Ahead - Page 9.

Forecast: Vog

We enjoy ideal weather day in day out - warm, sunny, occasional showers (read - rainbows), no pollution. But occasionally we get Vog. Volcanic Smog gets carried by tradewinds from erupting Kilauea on the Big Island. It's hazy, it's irritating to the eyes and lungs and just plain gross. Luckily it departs fairly quickly. Tomorrow I expect it to be back to normal - sunny and 82.

Happy Mother's Day - Now where can I collect my paycheck?

'Salary' for stay-at-home moms nearly $117,000

May 11, 2008
Los Angeles Times

Compensation study pegs moms' pay at $117,000.

If a stay-at-home mom could be compensated in dollars rather than personal satisfaction and unconditional love, she'd rake in nearly $117,000 a year.That's according to a study by Salary.com, a Waltham, Mass.-based firm that studies workplace compensation. The eighth annual survey calculated a mom's market value by studying pay levels for 10 job titles with duties performed by typical mothers, including housekeeper, teacher, psychologist and chief executive. This year, the annual salary for a stay-at-home mom would be $116,805, and a mom who juggles an outside job would get $68,405 for her motherly duties. The biggest driver of a mother's theoretical salary is the overtime pay she would receive. The 18,000 mothers surveyed about their typical week reported working 94.4 hours -- meaning they'd be spending more than half their working hours on overtime. Mothers who work outside the home reported an average 54.6-hour "mom workweek" besides the hours they spent at paying jobs.


What I want to know is why our pay went down from previous years (same company, same study) 2006- $134,121, 2007 - $138,095!

Apparently Avery didn't get the memo about my current salary, but I did get a lovely card, handprint and decorated dollar for Mothers Day. Accompanied by the "bestest, most tightest hug you've ever had". The flowers came from our current guests who graciously gave Ben credit for them when they realized they had just upstaged his non-gift. But since he started a 30-hour ICU shift early that morning he gets a pass. Not to mention the fact that I'm not his mother.

Banana Man Chase

It doesn't take much to convince me to run 3.1 miles. Give me a coupon for a free smoothie and I'm there. I also, despite popular belief, enjoy having a reason to get up early every once in a while. Because I don't have a gym membership and find it difficult to find motivation to go running, not to mention having someone to watch the kids so I can go (I gave up the jogging stroller thing about 2 years ago - it's just not what a run is supposed to be for me) I need things to "train" for - besides life.

The run was great, I didn't realize Honolulu would be so hot at 7am though, but I managed, thanks to a b-day running outfit made of moisture-wicking bamboo fibers. In addition to a Jamba Juice coupon they were blending up some Groovy Guava on the spot which was a welcome refresher and the best part was a free* massage that lasted at least 10 minutes.

On the down side, I didn't read the fine print when I picked up my packet the day before and missed a bit of info that was important in the timing of the race. I was supposed to get my ChampionChip ankle timer before the start. I only noticed once I was in the starting pack that everyone else had gotten the message and no, they weren't all wearing an alcohol monitoring anklet. I didn't have time to go seek one out because I had made a pit stop on the drive in at Starbucks, thinking that the Porta-Potty lines would be awfully long. I hadn't even considered that they might not have potties at all. So forgoing the Chip was actually the lesser of two evils. So due to my inability to follow the rules I got no official time and no chance to win free Jamba Juice for a year by placing in the top three in my age group. Which is 30-39 now (eek). But I crossed the line at 23:13**despite a lifesize banana running in circles around me as I sprinted to the finish (what I had thought was cute at the beginning of the race was quite annoying when you're sucking wind at the end)

*Technically all of these "free" things cost me $25 in entry fees.
**Had I had the chip the time would have been faster (by maybe 5 seconds) as it starts your time as you cross the start line, instead of when the gun goes off and the elite runners take off, and what I mean by elite is, if you can get by wearing only a sportsbra. My time for the last 5K I did almost exactly a year ago was 25:20. So, so far, 30 is feeling good.

April Recap

April would be the month of the revolving door -or slamming screen door, rather, as we had vistors galore. The front door slamming never sounded so good either. We hosted Ben’s parents plus McKay and Lindsay. We kept Mc for an extra week and took our trip to Kaua’i (see below). A few days later the 9:30 crew arrived – Jen, Alyssa, Chelsey, Noah, Sara and Mia. I call them that because they were beat and often asleep by 9:30. They could also be called the 5:45 crew since that’s what time they often woke up. With Ben’s parents we did a lot of hiking and birdwatching – when we would play back the pictures Ben’s dad took on the trip it went something like this – bird, bird, bird, whale, slightly blurry picture of a family member, perfectly crisp shot of a bird, etc. He also bought two books on birds of Hawai’i to remember his trip by. With the girls we did a lot of beach time. In other news…

Avery – Grew at least two inches. Must be all the peanut butter she is eating. I told her she was turning the color of peanut butter because of it and she believes me.

Miles – To sum up his achievements this month – words. Lots of them. A sampling of his new vocabulary include – Rain, Ice Cream, Outside and Chihuahua. He also became a bit of a bully while the “babies” were in town. He had a certain fondness for riding on Noah. Sorry Noah, he’s just trying to practice for becoming a jockey some day.

Ben - We saw a lot of him this month! He took the rest of his leave for the year and got off the rest of the month as early as noon and usually no later than 3. It was fun having him around during the day and he was gracious enough to do some babysitting a few nights so the girls could have some fun. Hope the kids enjoyed watching the NBA finals.

Me - I just put everything aside (including some bills that came due) while I was busy partying the month away. I did manage to get quite a few surfing sessions in this month and was able to take out my new – but old short board which has been a lot of fun. More on that later.